He feels free to touch us, pat us, lash out at us, snuggle up to us, or in my case, nurse, http://www.blogger.com/img/gl.link.gifas if we don't have separate bodies but are extensions of each other.
It is funny to think about how this will slowly fade away as he gets older. It has already done so, some, and will continue to. There will be a time where he and I will think it inappropriate or weird to snuggle up to me as he does (especially since right now he is fond of snaking one hand into my bra). And there will be a time where he will no longer have sweet baby skin to caress on his back or tummy and I will not be able to give him all the kisses I want, while he giggles for more.
Julian likes the sensory experience of taste and touch, so he loves fingers in the mouth, be it sucking his own thumb or feeling mommy's molars. It's amazing how even Ian gives up nearly every bit of personal space for Julian to explore. He climbs all over me, using my limbs as a ladder and my hair as handle bars. I'm his La-Z-Boy, his horse and his skateboard. He pokes my eyes and inspects my toes. He's so curious about the human body, both his own and others'.
He is a snuggler, but I think it could already be fading. Each time I hold him, hoping that he'll stay still a little longer. A little longer. What is it about that baby skin? I think about losing the intimacy to nuzzle that soft neck when he gets older, and then I remember how gradual and natural it happened between me and my parents. Never gone, just different ways of expressing emotions. But they taught me well, so I know good and well that I can still look forward to playing mama Shamu well into elementary school.
I, too, am sad at the thought of the day when he won't want to give me such big, sloppy kisses, so I just try to enjoy as many of them as I can now.
1 comment:
Thank you for your beautiful words and expressions. It touches me, as a mother, in the same way as Julian's soft skin touches you.
Post a Comment